Tomorrow morning IN THE AIR and scores of other curious arts journalists will go to the Guggenheim to attend “the launch of a new initiative linking artists, curators, educators, and audiences around the world.” What could this “global cultural exchange” be? Nobody seems to know, but we’re going to make some wild guesses.

— The Guggenheim and Gagosian are partnering to open a new museum in Beijing, the Guggosian.

— The Guggenheim will rent out its atrium for an exhibition of every single BMW Art Car.

— The Guggenheim ceases construction on previously secret Guggenheim Mars due to disputes with Martian labor unions.

— The Guggenheim ramp will be replaced with one of those airport moving sidewalks, in order to get more people through the space and increase ticket sales.

— Maurizio Cattelan to hang scale model of the Guggenheim inside himself.

— It’s really a new Tino Sehgal piece, “Press,” to see how many journalists they can get to show up for a mysterious announcement.

— The Guggenheim will open a new museum in every single Frank Lloyd Wright building in the world, by 2014.

— The Guggenheim will move to a new building alongside the Low Line, and rent its Upper East Side building to the Metropolitan Museum.

— To expand upon the successes of its BMW Guggenheim Lab while assuaging allegations that it perpetuates gentrification, the museum will launch the Toyota Guggenheim Meth Lab.

— In an effort to outshine MoMA’s current Kraftwerk concert series, the Guggenheim announces year-long Spinal Tap performance residency.

Check in tomorrow to find out what the press conference was really about.

Tags: Guggenheim, Museums, mysteries